The act of writing, of sharing the circumstances, the gifts and the graces planned and carried out by my Savior and God brings joy, peace, and contentment to know that He has my life in His hands. My prayer for those who read, who share in what I continue to learn each day, many times through my weakness, is that you will be encouraged to look for God's presence and grace in your life also.
Monday, May 14, 2012
Caring for Larry and Loving him well...
Yes, once again I am surprised, convicted, amazed and relieved that everything I do is only by God's grace.
Yesterday morning one of our pastors, Jason Tippetts, prayed for something that I've never heard prayed for from the pulpit before..
"...and for the caregivers. Help them to care for and love well those you have placed in their care..."
I caught my breath, tears filled my eyes and I said "Thank YOU." How much I need that prayer because sometimes it is just plain hard to "care for" and "love well" when:
it has been so long...
the days are long...
life seems unfair....
there isn't time...
God's presence isn't felt...
Those few words in that prayer reminded me that it is only through God's
enabling a needy child to care for and love Larry well. Actions that happen only because of the prayers of others and my own dependence on prayer to a God who is all-sufficient.
Through the years, when someone asks me how I have been able to care for Larry all these years, my answer has always been "God." But even as I say it I know there are times I am a miserable failure at caring for him.
But maybe, just maybe that is exactly what I need to realize..."I" can't do it.
In chapter 6 of A Praying Life, Paul Miller wrote about how important it is for him to realize his helplessness in dealing with his daughter who has autism.
"In the world of autism, Kim's pacing is called perseverating. It got so bad that we consulted her neurologist, who suggested a drug, which we tried, but Kim just gained weight, so we stopped the drug and went back to yelling!
"Jill and I have saturated Kim's life with prayer, but it dawned on me recently that I had never prayed for her or with her that she would stop pacing. Why? Because I already knew the solution: 'Kim needs to stop pacing. I will tell her to stop pacing.' In other words, I didn't feel helpless. I knew what to do. I call this the idiot approach to life. In other words, 'You idiot, if you would just stop...'"
And so once again God reminds me of my helplessness to fix things and the importance of prayer to enable me to care for Larry and love him well.
You see I get frustrated when he asks me what day it is today over and over. I know he can't remember more than one thing to do at a time...but I tell him several things he needs to do anyway. I really need him to be able to walk well, and when he doesn't, I really get frustrated.
I need to commit all of this to prayer. Even prayer with Larry.
Jason's prayer this morning for caregivers encouraged me. We all need to know others understand and are asking for God's help on our behalf. We need to pray for each other desperately.
Ephesians 6:18 "Praying at all times in the Spirt, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints,"
I Timothy 2:1 "First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people."
And so again I thank
my God and Savior,
my Rock and Redeemer,
my Provider and Lover for:
#476...Using a pastor's prayer to encourage and teach truth and remind
#477...Rain...a little to refresh and cleanse
#478...Two more pounds....lost
#480...Camera to capture the beauty
#482...A sister to spend time with walking the Santa Fe Trail for two hours
#483...Eyes to see YOUR creation
#484...Tables of Eight...time to get to know other brothers and sisters
#485...Children who cook well...Ahi, mushrooms, rhubard custard pie...Mother's Day
#487...Bear...not coming back for 6 days...
#488...Vegetables...growing...the provision from You
#489...Future daughter-in-law saying "Happy Mother's Day"...joy
#490...Larry...always for Larry...as he was...as he is...and as he will be...the hope
#491...The hope for me...what I will be when I see Jesus face to face
#493...Finding English ivy to plant behind waterfall
#495...Tea...iced...White Mango Peach
#496...Ann VasKomp...her Saturday blog of things to do...bless her well
#497...Sarah Young and Jesus Calling...a reminder of YOU everyday
#498...Waterfall and flowers to share with others
#499...Birds in backyard even if all but one bird feeder taken down
If you are new to this blog you might find some of the previous posts interesting and helpful. Look on the right side of this column to the most popular posts...enjoy and be encouraged in God' steadfast love and faithfulness.